But it was from the repression concept that the memory started to have another status, another dynamics. The memory would be something, at least not trustworthy, therefore many them important and significant elements could be restrained. To recoup this memory, revivendo the imprisoned emotions in the transference, would be a base of the psicanaltico method. Jung made a curious one contribution to the one placing in them that a present trauma could reorganize our souvenirs of front stops backwards. In this direction, the memory also is falsified, not for history, but for the gift.
Fairbairn in a very sagacious interpretation says in them that the bad object (I know that I more than gave a jump of 20 years here, but it pardons me the reader) is that one that does not have past, nor present, and, therefore it cannot have future. This conception of to the bad object atemporalidade that was perhaps very next the version to Freud on what it happens with the restrained one, but with a very interesting coolness. Bion in celebrates phrase? without memory and desire? it invites in them to equal memory and desire. Memory would be the desire here looking at for the past and selecting the facts that interest to it. Therefore, and there together with Lacan, asks for to the analyst who leaves its desire is of the doctor’s office. now comes the reflection: how many times in the doctor’s office our patients do not obtain to live here and now and are imprisoned and hostages of its bad objects? How many times to not obtaining to satisfy its desires in the gift, look at stop backwards in nostalgia that does not have end? How many times still are loading what this not to be loaded more there? ' ' Not carregue nada.' ' It says Buddhist the Zen teaching.
The sentimental dimension in the woman and the man cannot be quantificvel in function of gnero, of greater or minor sensitivity, respectively. Woman and man is part of one all that if conjugates by the way in fullness, that both suffer and if they cheer in the diverse situations of the life: ' ' Before the tears of a man, all and any woman is mother, nestling in its womb that one that, when crying, changeds into defenseless candy and menino' ' (Unknown Author) I consider that to cry is a reaction very sensible, something that torments in them or it cheers in them. In any of the situations, it is the maximum expression of feelings, that they exceed, almost always, the rationality of a prejudiced, egoistic and materialistic society. Accepted the principle, according to which: ' ' Reason without feeling could be cold; feeling without reason, is cego.' ' Who ridiculariza a man who cries, can disclose since soon being a insensitive person, auto-vain to possess exclusive values of its proper gnero (feminine or masculine) and not universal, will demonstrate to be a person incapable to understand situations and other people’s problems, a person whom, pretensiosamente, it desires to be fit in one definitive group that I would say ' ' pseudo-estico' ' The family, the community and the world, will be able to excuse people with such characteristics. The man who cries, that he lives proper feelings and he feels in the spirit the pain, the other people’s emotions, the problems, that recognizes its incapacity, momentnea, stops to decide them, or that after decided if it moves and it cries, it demonstrates that it is in the certain way, because: ' ' pranto of a man discloses that the emotion, implacable, breaches the floodgates of the machismo and goes down then in uncontrollable correrias.' ' Throughout the life and with elapsing of this, in that more experienced age, more cautious, and wiser, the emotions are stronger, because looking at itself it stops backwards, verify that many situations had been for deciding or badly had been decided e, perspectivando themselves the future, conclude that the available time will be each time less. .